Modern Family Law recently hosted a compelling LinkedIn Live Roundtable featuring managing attorneys from across the country discussing the topic of collaborative divorce versus litigation. The panel explored common misconceptions, evolving trends, and practical advice on navigating divorce with empathy, strategy, and clarity. Whether you’re just starting your divorce journey or seeking a better path forward, this conversation offered invaluable insight into the heart of family law today.
Karlee Stoppenhagen,
Managing Partner
Karlee brings her signature clarity and compassion to the discussion, guiding the panel through misconceptions, legal processes, and what it means to truly meet clients where they are.
Craig Valentine,
Managing Partner
With years of courtroom experience, Craig emphasizes the importance of client education, attorney collaboration, and finding grace during difficult moments.
Najmu Mohseen
Managing Attorney
Najmu offers thoughtful insights into the Texas legal process, debunks common myths about collaborative divorce, and emphasizes empathy, especially when working with pro se parties.
Brian Litzinger,
Managing Attorney
Brian shared real-world examples from both Colorado and Washington, advocating for transparency, communication, and a strategic approach tailored to each family’s needs.
The full discussion dives deeper into the realities of collaborative divorce and litigation, with each panelist sharing practical insights drawn from their experience in family law. Watch the video below to hear firsthand how they guide clients through conflict, dispel common myths, and promote resolution over rivalry:
Throughout the discussion, our panelists shared eye-opening perspectives on the differences between litigation and collaboration in divorce. Here’s a closer look at the key takeaways from the conversation:
1. Litigation Isn’t Always a Battle:
The attorneys clarified that litigation doesn’t automatically mean a hostile court battle. Brian Litzinger explained, “Most attorneys I work with want to resolve issues without a judge. Going to court is a last resort.” While court is sometimes necessary, a collaborative mindset can still guide the process.
2. Collaboration Requires Trust—And Realistic Expectations:
All panelists emphasized that collaboration is most effective when both parties are transparent and respectful. “If there’s domestic violence, financial secrecy, or control issues, the collaborative process may not be appropriate,” Brian noted. Understanding when collaboration works and when it doesn’t is key.
3. Clients Often Have Misconceptions:
From wanting “full custody” to assuming one lawyer can represent both parties, myths about the divorce process abound. Craig Valentine stressed the importance of client education, reminding viewers, “A bad spouse doesn’t equal a bad parent, and courts want both parents involved when possible.”
4. The Little Things Can Derail Big Plans:
Even seemingly minor disagreements, like over a China cabinet, can disrupt an otherwise amicable case. Brian shared, “Cases can fall apart over the smallest items. Often, it’s not about the object, but what it represents emotionally.”
5. Proactive Communication Prevents Conflict:
To de-escalate rising tensions, the panel encouraged picking up the phone instead of relying solely on email. “Tone gets lost in translation,” Brian said. “A quick call can resolve misunderstandings before they grow.”
6. Compassion is Critical—Even With Opposing Parties:
Najmu Mohseen shared how she approaches pro se parties (those without an attorney) with respect and empathy. “I always affirm that I’m not the enemy. I treat them with transparency, because this is likely the scariest process they’ve ever faced.”
7. Building a Collaborative Culture Starts Internally:
Craig highlighted how Modern Family Law hires attorneys who embrace collaboration over conflict. “Your reputation follows you. The way you treat opposing counsel today affects every client you’ll have tomorrow.”
8. Litigation and Collaboration Can Coexist:
The panel agreed that the best outcomes often come from blending both approaches. “It’s not either/or,” Karlee noted. “Litigation is sometimes necessary, but collaboration should always be the starting point.”
By embracing these principles, the panelists underscored how attorneys and clients can navigate divorce with strategy, clarity, and compassion.
This roundtable reinforced what we know to be true—family law isn’t about winning or losing. It’s about building solutions that work for families, even in difficult times. Whether your case leans toward litigation or collaboration, the right attorney helps you navigate the process with honesty, empathy, and a clear plan.
For those interested in exploring the full conversation, the complete transcript of this insightful roundtable is available. Follow the detailed dialogue between our managing attorneys as they share real-world experiences, clarify misconceptions, and offer practical advice on navigating divorce through collaboration or litigation.
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